The Devil is a Liar

Just a reminder: the enemy lies. 

Every single day. 

There is never a day where he is not out to destroy what God sets apart as good. 

The enemy loves to see conflict, chaos, division, seeking to isolate, hurt, destroying relationships and planting doubt. He plants seeds of doubt regarding Gods love for us, doubt of Christ actually at work in our lives, guilt, and SO. MANY. THINGS. He will even make us doubt if we are really saved. He gets us into the trap of “I’m always/will never (insert the things you fail at or never have)”. 

First of all, any time there is a thought of "I'm never enough" or "I'm always failing", it is a pretty good indicator that it is NOT Christ speaking. In CHRIST, we are made whole (Col. 2:10). We lack nothing. It’s not a job where we have to prove our “worth of being blessed” with a spouse/house/kids/etc and every stage is a “level up”. We are complete as we are today because JESUS makes us complete (Col. 2:10). We are sinners—but we are SAVED (Eph. 2:8). 

It is sometimes hard to comprehend because the world pushes us to always be more, do more, chase more, present our “best” us and always more more more more. Scripture says “be still”(Ps. 46:10). Scripture says “wait on the Lord and renew your strength” (Is. 40:31). Scripture says “by his stripes, we are healed (forgiven from our sin)(Is. 53:5). Scripture says we have the Holy Spirit at work in us—right NOW(Rom. 8:11). Scripture says we are NOT alone. Scripture says we have HOPE(Rom. 15:13). Scripture says to NOT be dismayed (Isa. 41:10). He chose US before we wanted Him.. that’s love.

Don’t listen to the lies. Don’t go down the hole of “I’m not/they never/I always/they won’t”. It is a hole and God never speaks to His people in this way. Even further, you have to intentionally be on guard to take every thought captive—ESPECIALLY while sliding through Instagram feeds. {Y’all. For real. It’s NOT real life. It’s one SECOND out of a 24 hour day where you don’t know how much that person is struggling. Okay. End rant}. We can't just pretend those thoughts away. We are fighting a spiritual battle every day and it also takes place in the battlegrounds of our minds.


Gird yourself with the Truth of God’s word—the God who set all things into motion. Go look—look and SEE what he says about you in His word. “I AM” is on the throne. You are not forsaken, alone, purposeless, or condemned because of the work of Christ. Stand FIRM in that and BELIEVE in Him. 

If It Scares Me...

“It scares me, so I’ll do it”. That has been my motto for the last 11 months. If you know anything about me, it's that I'm adventurous--but careful. I try to navigate things and choose the route with the least risk involved. I'm always up for a road trip or going to new places, but when it comes to people, I proceed with caution!

Last year was challenging for me. I had a lot of things happening all at once. I had a relationship end, several job changes, school challenges, and I just found myself very emotionally weary last summer. I had lost weight and so drained that I didn't know what to do with myself. I also came to the realization that I had a very real enemy breathing down my neck: FEAR. I have battled anxiety and fear my entire life. Some seasons, I am able to walk in more victory than others. However, last year, it was crippling. I realized that my coping methods had actually not been healthy and I was suddenly really afraid of...everything. I was afraid of what people thought about me, how much money I was (or was not) making, where I lived, my choice of degree and even just who I AM as a person. I had a lot of sleepless nights last year!

I finally came to a low place late last summer. I physically couldn't handle the way I was carrying all the fear of man and the things I had grown so insecure about. So I made some changes. I started receiving counseling, which helped IMMENSELY. Seriously. If you have been considering counseling but need that last little push--do it. It gives you a platform to stand on and a way to articulate feelings/thoughts that you don't know how to articulate. Aside from counseling, one other thing that I started to do was to say 'yes' to new things. Not EVERY single thing. Saying yes the things that I wanted to do, but was afraid to do. I started saying yes to things I could potentially fail at. This meant saying yes to the unfamiliar. I traveled to new places. I said yes to being on a podcast to talk about grief, something which is really vulnerable that I keep close to my heart. I said yes to receiving counseling and I also said yes to joining a growth group. I said yes to moving into Charlottesville with friends. I said yes to continuing my degree and being okay with some unclear details about the future. I said yes to allowing myself to be more vocal about Truth. I said yes to transparency--the good, bad AND the ugly truths. I said yes to opening up my creative side again!

Some of them seem less “scary”...but each one has been a step for me. I learned to not be ashamed of how God made me. God made me gentle, soft-spoken and yet spunky. I was afraid gentleness meant weakness or an excuse to get run over--but it is not. As I've been learning to do things that feel 'risky', I've also seen that I am made is exactly how God intended. Obviously I am not perfect (I wish!). BUT. I am made to be gentle because God designed me to be able to gently handle the people around me. He made me spunky and quirky in order to make people laugh. He made me a listener because I get to use that in my ministry. My gifts are designed for the ministry before me. It's not weakness--it's a strength. It can be scary and beautiful all at the same time!

It’s okay to find yourself afraid sometimes. Life can be pretty scary. BUT what if, instead of running from the possibility of failing, we look for the possibility of GROWTH? I’ve messed up many times this year; however, I have also seen how far I have come because I keep TRYING. God has picked me up each time and I have never been left alone. Truthfully, I haven’t grown because I succeed at everything I want to do. I’ve grown simply by saying “I’ll do my best” to the things that scare me. And honestly, in saying yes, you might just find that the giftings, talents and abilities that God has given you are strengthened by stepping out in faith. You might just see some things blossom as you take that risk. 
So, this is your little encouragement to try to do one thing that scares you. Whether it’s asking that person out, making that blog post, or having that conversation. Try one thing that scares you. Try one thing that you might risk failing at--one thing you might GROW from. Try it--one day at a time, one yes at a time. ♥️

 

Teach Me, Lord - A Poem

Teach me Lord, to cling to Thee

When storm and tempest rail,

To cast all doubt into the sea,

And raise, in Faith, a sail.

To launch my future o'er white-capped wave,

Eyes lifted in fearless trust.

My heart content in Thee to save

This Child from every gust.

(Google)

Teach me Lord, to cast on Thee

All my heavy cares

To them o'er the side with glee

Thru never ceasing prayer.

To smile at e'ry looming wave

Though daunting they will seem

My boat of Faith shall stay afloat,

For my Captain is my King.

(Google)

Teach me Lord, to lean on Thee

When harsh winds thrust me down.

To bless the gust which beats on me,

It runs my Faith to safest ground
To watch with Joy for mornings dawn
Tho long may seem the wait
'Till safely stored, my boat shall lay
Securely tied at Heavens Gate.

(c) Anna Dumaresq

(Google)

Only Believe

Well, time most certainly flies. I apologize for my bit of an absence-- last 2 1/2 months have just kind of....flown by? One reason, mainly is because we've been a bit busy! Bible studies, lots of snow, me taking spontaneous trips....the days kind of quickly pass when you least expect them to!

We have been having quite the winter--lots more snow!

15 inches, this particular day.

Our dog looked like a dolphin, bobbing in

and out of the snow :)

I slipped up to Massachusetts a over 2 weeks ago to see my friend Jessie and

 her new little baby boy Levi Daniel!

He is so precious!

~

Another reason for a bit of a silence is that God is taking me through another season of intense prayer, wrestling, and waiting on the Lord. I have been praying a lot for my family, for our struggles, our infirmities, and even just what serving God is supposed to look like for us as a family. I want to do another post about some of the things I am learning while praying, but just know that as you pray, KEEP PERSEVERING. KEEP MOVING FORWARD! I wish my caps lock was bigger, but KEEP GOING! :) Jesus is not deaf, nor apathetic to your prayers.

~

Why do I say this? A few weeks ago, I was really struggling. I was starting to feel that I had kind of slipped off God's radar temporarily, feeling useless, unfruitful and, as I was watching friends get married and have kids, feeling that odd fear of "Oh,  no...I'm being left behind." So, I turned to my best friend. I asked Jesus for strength, for faith, and for the quiet perseverance to wait on Him. As I was reading my Bible, He gave me a verse "Do not be afraid any longer, only believe" (Mark 5:36).

"Well...that was timely....as usual."

I clung to those verses (and still am), as a promise that God has not forgotten about me and does have a purpose for using my hands to labor in His fields.

~

AND THEN...DUN DUN DUNNNN.

~

That Sunday, our pastor opened up his Bible to--you guessed it--Mark 5! I will give you a little bit of a summary, although I really encourage you to read it for yourself:

Mark, starting in verse 21, describes how Jesus had just crossed over the sea, and was (as always) quickly surrounded by a large crowd. As He walks through the crowds, healing and ministering to people, He is suddenly approached by a synagogue official. This man, Jarius, threw himself at Jesus' feet pleading earnestly for Jesus to come and heal his daughter. His little girl, around the age of 12, was dying. "Please come and lay hands on her, so that she will get well and live", he implored (Mark 5:23). Jesus immediately began to follow Jarius to his home, pressing through the crowd. As they pressed through, a woman who had been bleeding for 12 years reached out her hand to touch Jesus, knowing He was her only hope and believing He could make her well. She was right, for as soon as she touched Him, she was healed! (By the way, for those of you who are not familiar with the customs, she was considered ceremonially unclean for 12 years and therefore could not make sacrifices or mingle with those who were "clean"...that's a BIG problem). Jesus knew she had been healed and had stopped to speak with her, saying "Daughter, your faith has made you well, go in peace and be healed of your affliction". While Jesus was still speaking to her, men from Jarius' home came and told him the devastating news--his little girl had died. They urged Jarius to stop bothering Jesus and to come home to mourn. Jesus turned and looked at Jarius--"Do not be afraid any longer, only believe".  Jesus went to Jarius home and, after baffling the assembled mourners by putting them out of the house and saying that the child was only sleeping, Jesus commanded the girl to get up. The child, lying on the bed, immediately got up and began to walk. They were all astounded!

~

First off, isn't it interesting that Jarius' daughter had been alive for the same amount of years that woman had been suffering with her illness? Pretty intriguing. Throughout this entire story, as I re-read it, I kept thinking about Jarius. Jarius was a synagogue official--He had status and was considered a man of importance. In a time where Jesus was saying things that were unbelievable and hard for the teachers and scribes to understand, this man threw aside his own pride and cast himself at Jesus mercy. He loved his daughter, and humbled himself in order to receive her life back. He showed humility in a crowd of people in his own town....at Jesus' mercy. Can you imagine his delight when Jesus began to follow him to his own house!?

Then. A distraction occurs. Not only does this man, Jesus and the apostles have to press through an enormous crowd, but there's a woman who needs Jesus too. I keep thinking of what Jarius must have been thinking--what was he doing during all of this? His daughter is dying...yet Jesus took the time to speak with this woman who needed help for 12 years. But Jarius said nothing. While Jesus was still speaking to the woman, Jarius' servants came and gave him the news he never wanted to hear--his little child was gone. What did he do? As they urged him to leave Jesus alone about the matter, Jarius said nothing. He looked to Jesus. Jesus said calmly and (I can bet you) gently "Do not be afraid any longer, only believe." What did Jarius do? He said nothing, but walked quietly beside Jesus, in expectation that He would take a heartbreaking situation and bring life from it. Can you imagine the heart drop he had when, upon reaching his house, he saw the mourners already wailing on behalf of his daughter and...himself? Yet Jesus said "Why make a commotion and weep? The child has not died, but is asleep." Ignoring the laughter and crazy looks, Jesus brought 3 apostles, Jarius and his wife into the bedroom where the body of the child lay. Jesus picked up the little girls' hand, looking at her, said "Little girl, I say to you, get up!"...and she opened her eyes and obeyed. Jarius had stepped out in humility, obeyed in quiet trust and was able to see the fruit of where he chose to put his trust--life through Jesus Christ.

~

I want that. I want to have the same reaction as Jarius--when situations seem hopeless, when it seems like God has "detoured", when I feel like God isn't working "quickly enough for me", to instead look directly at Jesus. Do not be afraid any longer, only believe. Instead of crying and complaining over fears, panicking over illness, worrying about things that are out of my control or even about my life-- to instead, fall in step behind my Master. I want to always choose humility and trust in the one who breathes Life into dry bones. Trust and Obey. Plus, just as Jesus healed a woman on the way to Jaruis's home, you never know what He is doing on the way to visiting your house! :)

Trusting and walking quietly behind the Giver of Life,





A Marking of Stones

This week has been hard. From some crazy schedules, bible studies, some health issues and my grandfather in a serious condition in the hospital, it has been a difficult past few days.

And yet.

As I drive from the hospital, to bible studies,then home to put in time working, I keep thinking about my last few chapters in Deuteronomy and the chapters in Joshua (which I have now started). I am about 7 chapters into Joshua, and I'll just summarize for you what's happening:

Moses has handed over position of leader of the Israelites  to this man called Joshua. If you remember from a previous post, Joshua is one of the men that God called out by name from amongst the entire host of people as a man with whom he was pleased. The entire first chapter is the Lord encouraging and instructing Joshua in what to do. This chapter is where the verse "Be strong and of good courage" is from (vs. 6). It is truly an incredible chapter, considering Joshua knew whose shoes he was going to be filling. When Moses left Egypt, even the Egyptians knew him to be a man of God. Moses spent days in the incredible presence of the Lord. Talk about pressure. Yet, the Lord God knew.

"As I was with Moses, so I will be with you."

That's pretty incredible, huh?

The next chapters have been about how faithful God is--He sends them out to cities and He goes before them! Some of the strongest cities even surrendered because they had heard about the God of the Israelites and were already terrified! If you are having a hard time right now with clinging to the faithfulness and ability of God, read Joshua. (Well, I personally think you should read it, regardless..but you know what I mean ;) )

One thing that has really struck me is the fact that God does not just provide victory for the people and then they move on. He proves Himself, then several times He has the Israelites build a memorial for the generations after them. In Chapter 4, it was specifically a pile of 12 stones, representing each tribe of Israel. It was seemingly just a pile of stones, yet so much more than that! Whenever someone would pass by that way again, they would see the stones and remember what God did at that river. It would be a testimony that would outlast that generation.

Google

 God's faithfulness is not merely for one generation people, but for generations of people. When we set a memorial down or a "landmark", it is not just for ourselves but also for our children...and for their children.

"[...] that this may be a sign among you, when your children ask in time to come
"What do those stones mean to you"? [...] and you shall let your children know that 'Israel passed over the Jordan on dry ground' [...] So that all the people on earth may know
that the hand of God is mighty;
That you may fear the LORD forever."

~Joshua 4:6, 23 & 24~

~

As I've been praying for strength and the nearness of God this week, I have been reminded to create a my own "memorial" and testimony of God's faithfulness. You definitely could build a memorial or set a physical stone as remembrance, but as for me, it often comes out in writing down a list of answered prayer or putting verses God has given me around my room (or on the bathroom mirror). It is a reminder to think on God's faithfulness, and it often causes people to ask about "that random list".

 Remember Gods' faithfulness. Keep track of answered prayers. Journal what God is teaching you, even if you have not seen the end result yet. Start listing the things you are asking God about (or asking for him to help) and watch as He answers. Write down when he answers! Set up visible verses in your home to remind you of what God has done for you, so when your children (or family members) ask, you can tell them of His faithfulness. This is so helpful on the days when the enemy wants us to believe that God is not listening. Remember His good nature and his merciful hand. And the neat thing is that if you start listing answered prayers, then it usually flows into Thanksgiving and Praise! 

Remembering His Faithfulness,

Fearless

I have struggled with fear ever since I was little. When I say struggle, I mean struggle. There are the "usual" fears-- of the dark, being left, and all those other "typical" fears. However, instead of outgrowing them as I grew older, I feel like my fears also grew with me. Quite a few came from seeing parts of violent movies when I was little, which caused me to have abnormal fears added to my list (fears of being alone at night or red night lights). I battled through my childhood with all these things, never truly gaining victory. And YET, God did not leave me there in my fear. He is a merciful God, and when we ask Him to help us---guess what? He WILL! Several years ago, God designated a sweet prayer time with an older woman who helped me pray through my fears! I asked the Lord to deliver me from my fear, to give me courage, and asked His forgiveness for choosing to be afraid rather than trusting Him. He answered me by setting me free from the shackles of anxiety. Needless to say, I do have to still fight to walk in victory. "For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms" is a very true word (Eph. 6:12). The enemy continually uses fear and intimidation against us. He wants to "cripple" us in order to keep us from being close to God OR from being fruitful in God's kingdom. Like I said---it is a fight. 

Over the summer, as I was praying through some options for the Fall, I had 3 main impressions:

a) That there were 3 specific people God wanted me to minister to.

b) This was to be a season of Prayer, Praise, and Perseverance. 

c) I wanted to be in Scripture as much as possible.

~

Needless to say, the enemy does not like any of the above options.

He will try to pull up things from your past to prevent you
from moving forward with God.

Things like fear.

~

Over the last few weeks, I've noticed that I have been seeing fear creep back into my life in small steps. From listening to people's extreme anxiety about world news, afraid to go to sleep because of  intense nightmares, or being feeling paranoid when walking down our (safe) road---all these things were leaving room for the enemy to creep in. I battled with it intensely knowing there was something wrong, but not really gaining full victory over it like I previously had. Then a few days ago God came and talked to me. 

"Lord, I am just so worried and tired..."
"So, are there any scriptures that come to mind right now??"
"Well, Do not fear is all over the Bible..."
"What kind of form is it given, Anna?"
"...It's in.....command form. Do not fear."
"Yes, command form. I want you to trust me and choose to obey what I say,
 because I love you."

~

I realized then that the enemy was attempting to creep in and "tie my hands" again (so to speak)---to get me in a flustered place where my fear bound my ability to actually be fully fruitful for God. I had specific things that God asked me to do--things which he was already blessing my efforts in--and the devil was not happy about it. So...I decided to obey God. The next day, I opened up the door to take my walk. I looked at the sky and said "God, today I choose obedience. I choose to not be afraid because YOU are my defender and if you can bring victory to an entire group of men (Israelites), you can protect and care for me. So, today, I want you to know that I trust you." Then I left my porch. I walked fearlessly down the road, rejoicing in Him. It was a great walk. :)


So, this week, I have determined (again) that I would rather be obedient to God and trust Him, than be crippled to ineffectiveness by the enemy! Praise God for victory again AND for allowing me to work for Him!

Walking Boldly in Him,